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how to recover from a breakup best way to get over a breakup science of heartbreak depression after breakup how to feel better after a breakup

Best way to get over a breakup: 3 tips to balance your brain chemicals

Published Feb 10, 2023 | Updated Aug 14, 2024
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Healthy romantic relationships bring happiness and promote mental well-being. They enhance emotional bonding and contribute to positive social connections. Your brain chemicals are intimately involved in the way you feel when in love. Sometimes, relationships end in heartbreaks. The feelings of depression after a breakup are a result of an imbalance in these chemicals. Breakups can pave the way to self-growth and maturity. Here are three ways to ease your heartbreak journey. But first, let's understand what happens to your brain during a breakup.

What is the science behind heartbreak?

Love can be considered an intense chemical reaction in the brain producing chemicals that make you feel euphoric while at the same time breaking your heart with pain when you call it quits.

What does heartbreak do to your brain?

Heartbreak hinders the release of 3 of your happiness chemicals. To give a little backstory to the science of heartbreak, love boosts your feel-good chemical serotonin, pleasure and reward chemical dopamine, and your cuddle hormone oxytocin. Let’s see what happens exactly:

  • Serotonin, your happiness brain chemical promotes good mood and regulates your sleep and appetite.
  • Your brain sees love as a reward, thus pumping out dopamine, your reward and pleasure brain chemical when you spend time with your loved one. Brain scans showed that looking at pictures of partners activated the reward system [1 Trusted Source 2016 - Indian Journal of Endocrinology and Metabolism Research evaluation The neuroendocrinology of love .
  • Oxytocin, your bonding brain chemical, is released during sexual activity and promotes attachment to your loved one [2 Trusted Source 2018 - Frontiers in Ecology and Evolution Research evaluation The Monogamy Paradox: What Do Love and Sex Have to Do With It?

When you experience a breakup, the potent mix of these chemicals responsible for the happiness felt in love, is diluted. Let’s take a closer look at it.

Why is a breakup so painful?

During a breakup, the levels of the happiness chemicals drop, making you feel low for days. Some people can even experience depression after breakup. The main reason why you feel sad post-breakup is because your brain hinders the release of brain chemicals that would help you feel better. Sometimes, a breakup also contributes to struggles in taking care of yourself - you may fall short on your dieting habits, workout routine and social interactions. As a poor diet impedes the production of serotonin and dopamine, and being less active and social stops the release of your happiness chemicals, you may form a cycle of low breakup mood. Therefore, finding alternative healthy ways to increase serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin can bring back your zest for life. 

How long does it take to recover from a breakup?

A magical cure to instantly cure your feelings after a breakup is yet to be discovered, therefore, recovering from a breakup may take days or weeks. Patience, perseverance and practical steps can go a long way. Let’s take a look at the best way to get over a breakup. 

How do I stop hurting after a breakup?

There are 3 easy and effective ways to increase your happiness chemicals serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin for your heart to stop aching after a breakup.

1 Serotonin to feel happy again

To bounce back to your former self, take a closer look at your diet. A nutrient found in protein-rich sources including tofu and chicken called tryptophan is converted to 5-HTP, which is then converted to serotonin(5ht). You can opt for a protein-rich breakup diet or alternatively opt for a supplement called 5-HTP for a quick and direct production of serotonin. Take a closer look at brain feed's 1-a-day 5-htp tablets for a serotonin boost.


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In a small study of 15 participants experiencing a breakup or romantic stress, 12.8mg 5-htp was taken for 6 weeks. The participants reported feeling better with reduction of stress upon 3 weeks of intake [3 Trusted Source 2010 - Neuro Endocrinology Letters Human study An open-label trial of L-5-hydroxytryptophan in subjects with romantic stress . So, how to recover from a breakup? 5-htp can be a helpful tool in your breakup recovery kit. Another way to boost serotonin levels is by spending time outdoors during sunny days. This activates serotonin production [4 Trusted Source 2013 - Innovations in Clinical Neuroscience Research evaluation Sunshine, Serotonin, and Skin: A Partial Explanation for Seasonal Patterns in Psychopathology? . This is a good incentive to get yourself outdoors and enjoy some sunshine when everything feels gloomy.

2 Oxytocin to feel loved again

Breakups can feel isolating. So, how to feel better after a breakup? Connecting with friends and family can lift your spirits. Spending time with pets can also increase oxytocin levels [5 Trusted Source 2019 - Animals: an Open Access Journal from MDPI Systematic and meta-analysis The Role of Oxytocin in the Dog–Owner Relationship . Focus your energy on positive social interactions and try oxytocin-making activities like singing, volunteering, and getting a massage [6 Trusted Source 2022 - Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience Human study Oxytocin Release Increases With Age and Is Associated With Life Satisfaction and Prosocial Behaviors , [7 Trusted Source 2012 - Alternative Therapies in Health and Medicine Human study Massage increases oxytocin and reduces adrenocorticotropin hormone in humans ] . As little as 15 minutes per day can boost your cuddle hormone.

3 Dopamine to feel the pleasures of life again

Dopamine is made from its building block, tyrosine found in protein rich foods (cheese, tofu, beef). Tyrosine is also found in supplemental form for a quick increase in dopamine levels, like the world’s 1st natural 800mg capsule.

Another way of increasing dopamine levels is to engage in regular exercise. A break-up can be a good opportunity to reinvent yourself by focusing on your physical health. Animal studies found that exercise increased dopamine levels by 40% and the levels stayed high for a week [8 Trusted Source 2022 - The Journal of Neuroscience Animal study Voluntary Exercise Boosts Striatal Dopamine Release: Evidence for the Necessary and Sufficient Role of BDNF . If you are looking for more relaxing activities, try practising meditation, an act of mindfulness which can also increase dopamine by 65% in a 1 hr session [9 Trusted Source 2002 - Brain Research. Cognitive Brain Research Human study Increased dopamine tone during meditation-induced change of consciousness .

Turn breakups into a learning experience and take charge of your mental well-being. Boost your brain chemicals to ease the lows because you are strong and it gets better. 

 

References

[1] Seshadri, K. G. (2016). The neuroendocrinology of love. Indian Journal of Endocrinology and Metabolism, 20(4), 558–563. https://doi.org/10.4103/2230-8210.183479

[2] Carter, C. S., & Perkeybile, A. M. (2018). The Monogamy Paradox: What Do Love and Sex Have to Do With It? Frontiers in Ecology and Evolution, 6. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fevo.2018.00202

[3] Emanuele, E., Bertona, M., Minoretti, P., & Geroldi, D. (2010). An open-label trial of L-5-hydroxytryptophan in subjects with romantic stress. Neuro Endocrinology Letters, 31(5), 663–666.

[4] Sansone, R. A., & Sansone, L. A. (2013). Sunshine, Serotonin, and Skin: A Partial Explanation for Seasonal Patterns in Psychopathology? Innovations in Clinical Neuroscience, 10(7–8), 20–24. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3779905/

[5] Marshall-Pescini, S., Schaebs, F. S., Gaugg, A., Meinert, A., Deschner, T., & Range, F. (2019). The Role of Oxytocin in the Dog–Owner Relationship. Animals : An Open Access Journal from MDPI, 9(10), 792. https://doi.org/10.3390/ani9100792

[6] Zak, P. J., Curry, B., Owen, T., & Barraza, J. A. (2022). Oxytocin Release Increases With Age and Is Associated With Life Satisfaction and Prosocial Behaviors. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience, 16, 846234. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnbeh.2022.846234

[7] Morhenn, V., Beavin, L. E., & Zak, P. J. (2012). Massage increases oxytocin and reduces adrenocorticotropin hormone in humans. Alternative Therapies in Health and Medicine, 18(6), 11–18. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23251939/

[8] Bastioli, G., Arnold, J. C., Mancini, M., Mar, A. C., Gamallo-Lana, B., Saadipour, K., Chao, M. V., & Rice, M. E. (2022). Voluntary Exercise Boosts Striatal Dopamine Release: Evidence for the Necessary and Sufficient Role of BDNF. The Journal of Neuroscience, 42(23), 4725–4736. https://doi.org/10.1523/JNEUROSCI.2273-21.2022

[9] Kjaer, T. W., Bertelsen, C., Piccini, P., Brooks, D., Alving, J., & Lou, H. C. (2002). Increased dopamine tone during meditation-induced change of consciousness. Brain Research. Cognitive Brain Research, 13(2), 255–259. https://doi.org/10.1016/s0926-6410(01)00106-9

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